Why, why, why?

I was sitting peacefully perusing a Jacque Pepin recipe when I heard it, the sound of my friend Jim’s plow. I opened the garage door to say hello and was surprised to see that last night’s snowstorm had dropped about six inches of that white stuff. After my hello’s I turned to go back inside and spotted my golf clubs standing in the corner like a lonely, cold sentinel beckoning me to walk over there and embrace them and once again put them to use. We’ve had a few years where golf was played far into the winter, but not much of a chance this year as at least 14 inches have already fallen in Southington and much more in other parts of the state.
It was then that a familiar thought came back into my head. Why in the world did my Polish ancestors settle up here in merry old New England? Why not Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia (Savannah is nice). Without question, New England has its charm, wonderful fall foliage, and a lot more, but on a morning like this it really “sucks”, unless of course you’re young and have no problem propelling yourself down a frozen slope. This aging body has reached a point where sitting by a roaring fire is the preferred activity. I’m not one who enjoys hot weather, but I feel I could probably have learned to adjust to sweating a little more.

Well at least everyone will get that wished for White Christmas, don’t see a thaw coming to melt it away. Another thought just popped in. Why to bears get to sleep away the winter. Have to try that some day.

Wait Staff Do's and Don'ts

While surfing the Yahoo website I ran across an article by a New York Times writer who outlined fifty no-no’s for restaurant staffers. I found it quite interesting and thought I would pass it on to my fellow restaurant goers. Although the list is quite thorough, I’m sure we can even add to the list.

50 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do

1. Do not let anyone enter the restaurant without a warm greeting.
2. Do not make a singleton feel bad. Do not say, “Are you waiting for someone?” Ask for a reservation. Ask if he or she would like to sit at the bar.
3. Never refuse to seat three guests because a fourth has not yet arrived.
4. If a table is not ready within a reasonable length of time, offer a free drink and/or amuse-bouche. The guests may be tired and hungry and thirsty, and they did everything right.
5. Tables should be level without anyone asking. Fix it before guests are seated.
6. Do not lead the witness with, “Bottled water or just tap?” Both are fine. Remain neutral.
7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.
8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
9. Do not recite the specials too fast or robotically or dramatically. It is not a soliloquy. This is not an audition.
10. Do not inject your personal favorites when explaining the specials.
11. Do not hustle the lobsters. That is, do not say, “We only have two lobsters left.” Even if there are only two lobsters left.
12. Do not touch the rim of a water glass. Or any other glass.
13. Handle wine glasses by their stems and silverware by the handles.
14. When you ask, “How’s everything?” or “How was the meal?” listen to the answer and fix whatever is not right.
15. Never say “I don’t know” to any question without following with, “I’ll find out.”
16. If someone requests more sauce or gravy or cheese, bring a side dish of same. No pouring. Let them help themselves.
17. Do not take an empty plate from one guest while others are still eating the same course. Wait, wait, wait.
18. Know before approaching a table who has ordered what. Do not ask, “Who’s having the shrimp?”
19. Offer guests butter and/or olive oil with their bread.
20. Never refuse to substitute one vegetable for another.
21. Never serve anything that looks creepy or runny or wrong.
22. If someone is unsure about a wine choice, help him. That might mean sending someone else to the table or offering a taste or two.
23. If someone likes a wine, steam the label off the bottle and give it to the guest with the bill. It has the year, the vintner, the importer, etc.
24. Never use the same glass for a second drink.
25. Make sure the glasses are clean. Inspect them before placing them on the table.
26. Never assume people want their white wine in an ice bucket. Inquire.
27. For red wine, ask if the guests want to pour their own or prefer the waiter to pour.
28. Do not put your hands all over the spout of a wine bottle while removing the cork.
29. Do not pop a champagne cork. Remove it quietly, gracefully. The less noise the better.
30. Never let the wine bottle touch the glass into which you are pouring. No one wants to drink the dust or dirt from the bottle.
31. Never remove a plate full of food without asking what went wrong. Obviously, something went wrong.
32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them.
33. Do not bang into chairs or tables when passing by.
34. Do not have a personal conversation with another server within earshot of customers.
35. Do not eat or drink in plain view of guests.
36. Never reek from perfume or cigarettes. People want to smell the food and beverage.
37. Do not drink alcohol on the job, even if invited by the guests. “Not when I’m on duty” will suffice.
38. Do not call a guy a “dude.”
39. Do not call a woman “lady.”
40. Never say, “Good choice,” implying that other choices are bad.
41. Saying, “No problem” is a problem. It has a tone of insincerity or sarcasm. “My pleasure” or “You’re welcome” will do.
42. Do not compliment a guest’s attire or hairdo or makeup. You are insulting someone else.
43. Never mention what your favorite dessert is. It’s irrelevant.
44. Do not discuss your own eating habits, be you vegan or lactose intolerant or diabetic.
45. Do not curse, no matter how young or hip the guests.
46. Never acknowledge any one guest over and above any other. All guests are equal.
47. Do not gossip about co-workers or guests within earshot of guests.
48. Do not ask what someone is eating or drinking when they ask for more; remember or consult the order.
49. Never mention the tip, unless asked.
50. Do not turn on the charm when it’s tip time. Be consistent throughout.

The End of the Quest

I think everyone has had a meal that they consider memorable. Most, I’m sure remember the good one, while I on the other hand remember the bad. Years ago, not sure how many, Marge and I joined our friends on a trip to Amish Country in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. While there we did all the usual touristy things, one of which is driving through the beautiful, and peaceful countryside. The Sunday of this particular trip we headed out into the Amish farm country and headed toward Blue Ball, Pa, one of the many small towns with the strange and sometime suggestive names like, Blue Ball, Intercourse, Bird-in-Hand, and Paradise etc. Blue Ball being especially intriguing, became our destination. After enjoying the scenery for quite some time, we realized that we were all a little hungry so we began looking for a restaurant. This became a bit of a problem, weren’t many places to eat in good old Blue Ball Pa. Finally spotted a place and pulled in. I don’t think they were too happy to see us, no other customers, and the wait staff looked as though they wanted to close and go home. They did, however, seat us and took our orders. Marge and our friends ordered a turkey dinner while me, always the different one, ordered roasted chicken.

Well, let me tell you, this chicken must have spent the previous few weeks in the coop doing pushups, deep knee bends and running miles and miles on a chicken tread mill, because this was absolutely the toughest, rubbery chicken imaginable. I literally could not chew or break this meat down to a point of swallowing and for a man with my appetite; this had to be a first. Honestly, you coud not believe how tough this bird was. At the time, I was, needlessly disturbed (you think), but later we had many laughs about the “Rubber Chicken of Blue Balls”. It really has been a lot of fun talking about it over the years.
Our friends have been back to the area many times and tried to find that “Rubber Chicken Restaurant” again, but with no success.

Well, guess what? We were back in Amish land this past week and decided to give the quest another shot. During our quest we decided that perhaps it was not in Blue Ball after all, but in an adjoining town so we continued down the road to New Holland and lo and behold before our eyes stood the Peoples Restaurant (now we even had a name) alias the “Rubber Chicken Restaurant”. We even decided to have lunch there in honor of our memorable rubber chicken episode. None of the same excitement this time, there were new owners and no chickens exercising in the back yard. I even ordered chicken rice soup, with the hope of a new adventure, but no tough meat in this one. Although the one piece of meat the size of a dime was a little laughable, but pretty tender.

We’re all quite saddened that the quest is over, but I will still occasionally bore people with my rubber chicken escapade.

Here we go again

First of all, before I proceed with this Blog entry I need to apologize. When I decided to create a Blog Site I intended to come up with some real entertaining and stimulating stuff. In reviewing my previous entries I found that many dealt with the trials and tribulations of advancing age. In all honesty I do not need to be reminded, but I’m sorry to say that conversations amongst friends and acquaintances all revolve around the effects of advancing age. Are any of you experiencing the same thing?

As an example, yesterday I played in a golf tournament sponsored by the Calendar House which is the Senior Center in Southington, Connecticut. Here’s four guys out for a good time on the links. Know what we talked about? Frequency of nighttime urination, new procedures on enlarged prostates, how many times we get up during the night. How come so many of us are wide awake at 4:00 A.M. in the morning, shouldn’t we form some kind of early bird club. Strange how we slept like rocks till all hours a few years back and now we’re clicking away madly on our remotes to find something decent to watch at 4:00 besides infomercials.

You must agree that all of this is not even remotely exciting, but that’s not the worst of it. Never, and I mean never, ask any of these elderly gentlemen how they’re feeling, because by God you better be prepared to find out. I now know more about bypass surgery, high blood pressure, high sugar counts and enough other medical problems to create a little journal.

Then there’s the discussion about the diminished length of their tee shots. All the technology available today doesn’t appear to add the necessary yardage. I must say that hitting the ball from the senior tees does help a little. That’s one of the very few advantages of advancing age along with an occasional senior discount and getting away with some things that only seniors can get away with.

I will say that I did have a pleasant surprise this past weekend. Our High School Class of 1952 held a little class reunion pizza party. We had our 55^th a couple of years ago, but we decided that at our age we shouldn’t wait every five years. The surprise was that everyone was so much older looking than me…….lol. See how boring this stuff is.

Now you know why I apologized right at the start.

Well, let's away from the old stuff. Marge and I, along with our friends once again completed the Connecticut Wine Trail. We visited 19 of the possible 24 wineries on the trail. Now we wait to see if they pick our passports at the drawing for many trips including a couple to Spain. This was our third year doing it. Of course with what we spend on these winery trips it would be smarter for us to just pay for the trip.

Old Brain Syndrome

I know you’ve all been waiting patiently for my next literary gem. Well, sorry to disappoint you, but this isn’t it. Besides a very busy summer schedule, Red Hat Picnic, Dinner for 137 at the Church to celebrate our Patron, Saint Dominic, a Rock Cat baseball game outing, work on a 57^th Class Reunion party, and a bunch of other projects, my brain has taken a little vacation.

That now vacant growth on top of my neck has not given me much to work with. Every time I think it’s time to bore you people with a new blog entry I end up sitting in front of the screen with fingers that are unable to move poised over the keyboard. I guess the fancy explanation is writer’s block. I can’t even use that excuse, since I certainly don’t consider myself a writer. Let’s just call it for lack of anything better “Old Brain Syndrome”. May just as well since they now have a syndrome for anything that ails us. I cannot believe that I have survived for so many years because I hear about a new disease every time I turn on the TV. I firmly believe that the drug companies develop a drug and then create a disease for it. With all the things we can now die from how the hell do we survive? And if we do decide to take their advice and actually take the pill they’re touting, can you believe the side effects……..scares the shit out of me, rather have the disease.

Just to let you know, the golf game continues to maintain a high degree of mediocrity with only rare moments of athletic brilliance. I’m thinking that with many people now living to be 100 there is an outside chance I’ll be able to shoot my age, although with increasing aches and pains, that might be a real long shot.

We’ve started our annual Connecticut Wine Tour. You will recall that the state wineries have a passport program where you get it stamped at each winery you visit. If you are able to visit 15 of them you can turn in the book and have it entered in a drawing for some very nice trips and prizes. This is the third year we are doing it…..maybe this time. We set a record a couple of weeks ago when we stopped at six wineries on a Friday afternoon. Fortunately we had a nice little picnic lunch before starting, helped to absorb some of that alcohol. This trip took place in our northwest corner (Litchfield County) and included stops in East Canaan, a few in Goshen and a two in New Hartford. These trips have proven really enjoyable. Vineyard owners all have been very nice and in most case quite informative. At these stops we’ve had a chance to meet people from all over the country tasting our Connecticut wines. Some of which, by the way, are quite nice. Here’s a vineyard owner we met a few weeks ago on out southeastern trip.

Hope you all enjoy the rest of this summer. Hopefully the brain will begin working again and I’ll have something interesting for you.

A Real Phenomenon

I’ve been sitting at this keyboard for about fifteen minutes trying to figure out how to start a Blog about a phenomenon. For many years now my brother has been insisting that Marge and I attend a Paul McCartney concert. On his last tour I found enough excuses not to join him at each venue until the tour ran out. Trust me, it’s not because I dislike McCartney, quite the contrary, but at 74 years of age I don’t look at myself as a concert type. I personally abhor crowds. His enthusiasm finally won me over this year and I agreed to have him get tickets for his performance at Citi Field in New York. How can you continue to fight someone who has, to date, attended 17 McCartney performances?

Was I sorry? Hell no! I was finally witness to a phenomenon. Think about this. Thousands of fans, old, young, and middle aged like me…..lol, standing, swaying, singing and screaming to the music of a 67 year old man. And sing and sway they did to 33 songs for two and one half hours. And this after doing two other concerts two days ago. What other 67 year old could draw that much attention and, yes, even reverence? Unbelievable! And all this in a rainy mist on wet seats. I must say I was greatly impressed and, yes, I really enjoyed myself.

It was interesting talking to the people around us; some were McCartney virgins like me and others like my brother who had followed Paul all over the country on his tours. As I looked around me, the mix of the audience was really something. In the seats right in front of me was a young couple, who knew the music and words to every song. And sing and dance they did. My only downer for the evening was having the bad luck sitting next to a fellow who was larger than me and was as excited as a 60’s teenager to be there. He spent the entire evening bouncing his naked legs (he wore shorts) up and down to the music as well as singing. In case you don’t know, stadium seats are not that wide. Not the kind of thrill I was looking for, couldn’t it have been the girl in front with the purple mini skirt hah!

Never one to show any degree of being hip, I did, however, have my moments. One of them occurred during the performance of “Let it Be”. I began to feel people poking me in the back. I looked turned and saw that the young women in back of me were saying something as they continued to poke me in the back. I finally realized that I was wearing a shirt my daughter bought me that had “Let it Be” emblazoned on the back. Man I really felt with it then! Back at the hotel lobby where we stayed, a man stopped me and was quite impressed with this old fart wearing his “Let it Be” shirt.

I had another interesting thing happen on the way from one of my bathroom trips. I had forgotten that I was wearing my NCIS cap (I’m a big fan), and a fellow stopped me and asked if I worked for NCIS. I said I wish I did then I could meet all the cast (Ziva and Abby especially). Well anyway it turns out that this guy is friends with Donald Bellisario, the creator of the show. What a small world. Some day you can ask me about another “small world occurrence”.

Stressed for nothing!

It’s been raining now for about two hours, although the word rain doesn’t seem strong enough to describe the downpour. It almost looks as though the velocity and size of the water drops are enough to put dents in your skull (notice I called hem water drops not that gentle work “rain”). I’ve been sitting watching TV and trying to relax, but I just know I’m not going to be happy at what I see if I look outside. We have a pool and paved deck and patio area right outside of the family room and I just know I will be witnessing a flood. I finally got enough courage to turn on the spots and go outside. Well, of course I was right, pool totally filled and overflowing, entire deck area under a couple inches of water and believe it or not it is still pouring. I know that many people have much bigger problems with this storm, but for me, it is my little hell. Great timing, twenty nine people coming for a July 4th picnic and swim. What to do now?

Well first order of business is to get some water out of the pool. Set the backwash on the filter and let it rip for over a half an hour. Dropped the level a little and created a new stream flowing down Hidden Hills Drive. Now I can only hope all the water drips down the seams in the pavers……fat chance of that.

My first glance at the pool area early this morning proved one thing to me….I worry too much and should learn to take things in stride. Water had all seeped into the ground and bricks had begun to dry. Let some more water out, dead headed all the soaked plants, and swept up the junk that washed into the pool area.
Looked like new again and I’m all set for the next downpour which seems to be the norm this past year in Connecticut. Now I need a sunny 4th. Twenty nine people don’t fit well indoors and there is no way I can eat all that prepared food by my self

This Modern World

This past Father’s Day one of my Granddaughters came and asked me, “Poppi, how do I turn the TV on”? When I was her age all we did was walk over to the set, turn the off/on knob and flip the channel selector to one of the two or three stations available at that time. I told her how and then thought about the whole TV thing. I must look pretty foolish when I sit in the recliner watching TV. A remote in my left hand, one in my right hand, another nearby on the end table and even one more in case I should ever use the VCR. Oh yes, one more in a basket for the air conditioner. Ridiculous, but necessary. One remote that came with the set, then another added for the new updated Digital and HD box, and let us not forget the Bose surround sound, need a remote for that too.

Have we gone too far in this electronic age? What have we gained for all these so-called advancements? Now I don’t even get any exercise getting up to change the channels, but I’ve got terrific muscles in my thumbs, created by my futile attempts to avoid the dumbest commercials every created in the past fifty years. Seems to me we were not annoyed by them in the “old days”, and they weren’t so damn long. The sad thing is that we are paying dearly to watch hours and hours of commercials. Just have one sleepless night and try to entertain yourself. Entertain with what? The beloved infomercials. Think about it……paying nearly $100 a month to be annoyed most of the time.

And don’t even get me talking about cell phones, blueberries, blackberries, strawberries and all the other electronic means of communication. Text this! What’s the matter with talking to each other? Ok, I’m done for now.

Southwest National Park Tour

1. Eight days and 217 pictures later we're back in New England. For years we talked about making a trip to the Grand Canyon, but always seemed to procrastinate and never got there. I am so happy we finally decided to go. We took a Caravan Tour that began in Phoenix, Arizona, headed North to Sedona, Grand Canyon, Lake Powell, Bryce Canyon and Zion National Park. I'm someone who is normally difficult to impress, but this week every day managed to amaze me. The sights are mind boggling, no words or pictures can do them justice. I recommend that you grab a pen or pencil and immediately put a trip here on your "Bucket List". You really have to see it before you die. I wish I were able to show you all 217 pictures here. If you want to see the rest, let me know, I'll email them to you.

We were also very fortunate to have an excellent Tour Director, Bruce Gilbert, who had a vast knowledge of the area and passed it on to us at every opportunity. Additionally everything went like clockwork with not a hitch in the program. I must say that even the airports were tolerable. Many who know me have a good idea of how I detest airports. This trip proved to be so good, we're already planning the next one.
Top picture is of Marge at the Grand Canyon. We even got some pictures of Marge standing in front of three huge Elk and Mule deer feeding on the lodge lawn. We're told they come out every day. Second picture is called the three sisters. This was take in Monument Valley (Navajo Reservation land). Third and fourth were taken at Bryce Canyon, probably the prettiest of all the stops. By the way, those little dots in the third picture are people who made their way down a hiking path.
I think I'll stop. Have always tried to keep my Blogs short so as not to bore you, but I can't promise not to write some more about it in the future.

1. 

Rhino's Recipes

I can’t believe that it’s been two and a half years since I started this “Blog” site, October 2nd to be exact. At that time I thought I would be able to sit down and put to paper my thoughts and happenings of the day, but thinking more about it I said to my self, “Self”, who the hell wants to know what I did each day. Not exciting for me, why the hell would it be exciting to my friends? That’s when I began with a few “Blog bitch entries”. But how long before all of you tire of hearing me bitch.

Ok, now what? Let’s wait till I have something interesting to write about. You’re kidding right? When is that going to happen? So here I am still waiting since the beginning of April for something to write about. I really do feel bad about it because, strange as it may seem, a few of you actually told me you enjoyed them.

Many of you have told me that I have too much time on my hands and I should get a life. Probably because of this Blog site and some of the other, I guess weird, things I do at the computer, like laying out spreadsheets for so many things such as breakdowns on all our annual family expenses, inventory sheets on all the food stuffs on our cellar storage shelves, and even an inventory of all upstairs and downstairs freezers. Even have one with breakdown for tax filings. Why I save my accountant all that work is even beyond me, especially since he still charges me the same.

Now I’ve probably really gone off the deep end. Most of you know that I enjoy cooking and as a result have collected copies of many recipes that I have either tried or wish to in the future. Also wrote up a few of my own creations. Laying around in drawers were also a few family recipes from my mother, my mother-in-law, our own kids and friends who had been kind enough to give me a copy. Decided to make a cook book out of the collection and pass a copy on to family. Here's a sample from my daughter. By the way, great tasting recipe.

Salmon with Mustard Sauce – Karolin Palko

2 pounds salmon fillets
4 tablespoons butter, melted
1/2 cup white wine 2/3 cup heavy cream
1-1/2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
4 shallots, finely chopped Juice of one lemon
1-1/2 teaspoon salt and 1 teaspoon fresh ground pepper

Arrange salmon in single layer in a large baking dish. Drizzle with butter and lemon juice. Cook uncovered in 400 degree preheated oven for 15 minutes. In a small saucepan, simmer shallots and wine together on low heat until wine has evaporated and shallots are tender, about 8 minutes. Stir in cream , mustard, salt and pepper. Pour sauce over fish, return to oven and bake for additional 5 minutes or until fish is glazed but not browned. Serves 6

So now they will all have a cookbook called “Rhino’s Recipes” nicely bound and indexed. This way they are stuck with a reminder of the old guy even long after I’m gone……lol, lucky them.

For a personal copy of this masterpiece please send me a check for $149.95 plus $6.00 shipping and handling.
P.S. Will also autograph for additional $25.00
Only kidding!!!!

Basketball and Pressure

I’m so very happy that our Uconn girl’s have taken the National Championship. It’s sad though, because it’s all over and we have to wait seven months to see them again. On the very bright side, my wife, Marge, can now experience normal blood pressure readings. We watch the game with a blood pressure machine right next to her. I’m not joking, even with our team leading by twenty, any short run by the opposition will require a pressure reading. For Marge she will only breathe easy if we lead by thirty.

The girls have provided us with so much pleasure over the past fifteen years or so, that donating money to CPTV is actually a pleasure. In fact we have blankets, shirts, license plate holders, CDs, jackets and books to prove it. This year our complimentary gift was an autographed copy of Mel Thomas’s book. Good reading by the way.

Over these past years, we’ve attended three final fours, which gave us the opportunity to see Atlanta, New Orleans, and Tampa, Florida. We decided not to get tickets this year because we definitely did not enjoy the finals in Tampa. Not so much because they lost, but because our lottery tickets were absolutely the worst seats in the entire stadium. Seats were in the top row of the third deck in the corner of the stadium, seats against the wall. An oxygen mask might have helped the trip up and down the stairs. Issuing us a parachute might have also been advisable with how steep the damn stairs were. We were so high that we ended up pretty much watching the game on the big screen on the ceiling. Would have been better in a bar with a drink in hand….loss also might have been easier to take. We were not going to take another chance with the lottery. Actually two recliners facing a large flat screen did the trick for me this year. Might try it again for next years, or go there and buy them on the street. San Antonio sounds like a great place to spend a few days.

Well now its golf time, we’ll see what the year brings. I’m sure there’ll be plenty for me to write about after a few trips to the course. Till next time.

Back from the Beach

Well, the long awaited 27th annual golf trip to Myrtle Beach has come and gone. Truly unbelievable how quickly a week passes. We drove down this year so we had thirteen and a half hours of camaraderie. Surprisingly, even after 27 years doing this trip we still find a way to enjoy each others company.

Trip itself was pretty much a carbon copy of so many others. We seem to gravitate to many of the same golf courses and restaurants. Golf was a real challenge this year. Drives mostly down the middle, approaches adequate, but putting horrendous, at least for the first few days…….could no remember ever having as many three and four putt greens. Finally came back a little on the fourth day and managed to win some of my money back. In fact total loss for the week was only $6.00. I guess you can even call that a good week all things considered.

The attempt, however, to maintain the great diet program didn’t meet with the same success. Although I tried real hard and ate quite a few salads, the ever present exposure to beer and other libations made it nearly impossible to behave 24/7. The condo fridge supplied with Mud Slides, Margarita’s, Tequila, beer, the cart girls on the course and the ever present pitchers of beer during lunch and dinner tested me all week (in private I’ll give you some figures).

Food also tested my resolve as we visited many of the haunts of the past, Hamburger Joes (best fried bologna sandwiches ever, topped with cole slaw, chili and cheese), Hooters for wings and Cobb Salad, and Shuckers for Oysters on the half shell. Even introduced the group to some great German Food at Horst Gasthaus. Some had red cabbage for the first time ever along with various veal dishes……German Beer and music of course. In between all this we were able to enjoy a show at the Legends in Concert where we saw Jerry Lee Lewis, Louie Armstrong, Reba McEntire, Blues Brothers and Elvis Presley flawlessly imitated. Believe it or not we even went shopping at Broadway at the Beach.



Not having a scale in the place probably made it a little easier to avoid the guilt. Came home and didn’t dare weigh myself until I had a few days to again acclimate my body once again to a life of moderation. Finally hit the scales and was disappointed to see that I brought back four pounds of South Carolina pleasure. A few additional days of good behavior brought me back to my weight before the trip……yippee, now I can get back to working on it. Yes, I know, no more diet talk, I’m done.

And the fun begins again. We find it necessary to conduct many meetings during the year to plan our visits to Myrtle (we even had one to determine what time of the morning we were going to leave..lol)……you can imagine what these meetings entail.

Addiction

The playing card symbol shown here is aptly named “Freecell Addiction”. I must confess that I probably have suffered from this addiction. When I was still working, I would take a few minutes at the close of the day and play a few random games to relax a little. We eventually purchased a computer for the house and continued playing an occasional game or two. The computer we purchased came with the old Windows 95 operating system which offered 32,000 Freecell games. In checking it out on the web I found that there were some people on this planet that actually claimed to have played all 32,000 games. I could not bring myself to believe they were able to do this since I felt they would have to be playing 24 hours a day. But what a challenge that must be? I decided to start playing games sequentially beginning with number 1. Well, I have to admit, it did become somewhat of an addiction.

During the course of this Freecell marathon I decided that when I reached 5,000 I would quit. Well, 5,000 was eventually reached, but I was unable to stop, next target 6,000 and so on. As the thousand figures came, I tried to stop each time, but stubbornly carried on after Marge said, “why not keep going”? Well on and on I went till this week I completed my 15,000^th Freecell game. Since I’ve been told by my friends many times that I have too much time on my hands and that I need to get a life, I’ve decided that I’m going to go cold turkey and stop right now. I must admit that I did have ideas of doing them all, but if anything convinced me to call it quits it was the fact that the new xp operating system in this computer has 1,000,000 game possibilities. Since my first 15,000 took several years, I don’t plan on living long enough for the next 985,000. Wish me luck in keeping my fingers off the keyboard. I guess if I was able to quit smoking cold turkey, this should be a snap.

Valentine's Day - 2009

I sat down at my computer this morning with the intention of composing an addition to my ”Blog” site. When I keyed in the date I realized what day this was, the “High Holiday” of romantic gift giving to wives, girlfriends, mistresses, and teachers. Oh Oh, here we go again…….nothing really against the day, but after being married for fifty four and one half years, do you have any idea how difficult it is to make yet another day memorable.

Think about it, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Christmas, Birthdays, that’s four a year times 54.5. Two hundred eighteen unique, thoughtful gifts. Mind boggling isn’t it. What should I do? We’ve already not given ourselves gifts on a few occasions like this last Christmas. Can I get away with another one even though it is the one romantic one that reminds your loved one that you still care? Well I guess that statement pretty much gives me my answer, but what do I get for the 55th time? Candy, no we’re on diets, jewelry, no, done that one many times, don’t forget this is the 55th time.

Well, I guess it’s going to have to be flowers. Price Chopper here I come. My God look at all the flower displays, roses everywhere and such beautiful arrangements, but look at the “freaking” prices, forty and fifty per dozen, not like it was fifty five years ago. At today’s prices I could have bought an entire garden. Well, stepping away from all those high priced (perfect for the young guy trying to impress) ones, I ventured into the old guy’s section. Look at that…..I was immediately attracted to three pretty yellow roses with fake diamonds inserted in them and accompanied by baby breath and some additional unidentifiable piece of vegetation. Actually it was very pretty for the modest price of $9.99. Well, naturally it came home with me. I found a great little vase, trimmed the flowers and made a valiant effort to arrange them perfectly. In doing so I proceeded to almost knock the head off one of the roses. Really a bit of a disaster when you only start off with three, but I neatly propped it up, at least until Marge had a chance to see them.

All’s well though, I really think Marge liked them and was a bit surprised that this old fart made the effort.


Happy Valentine’s Day to all my women readers.

Winter Misery

This year’s golfing trip to Myrtle Beach will be our 27^th consecutive trip. All of them except two were to Myrtle Beach and only one that was without our regular foursome. Can you imagine, that many years with no arguments, in this day and age very few marriages last that long. After so many years, anticipation of the event each year has on occasion diminished, but this year I can’t wait to get going. Winter has become a tremendous bore. These past few weeks I feel like a prisoner. The recent ice storm has confined me to this desk so much that I’ve begun to search for some ointment to get rid of what I think are calluses developing on my posterior. Trips down the driveway to get the mail or paper have been bad enough with the snow storms, but virtually impossible after this coating of ice. I have to drive my car down to get them, and forget trying to get the rubbish down for the weekly collection. I'm even bring that down by car. I spent $12.00 on a bag of some kind of miracle stuff to melt the ice. I should have just thrown it down the toilet for all the good it did trying to clear the glacier good old Mother Nature gave me for a present.

Oh well, it is winter and it is New England, and I’ve probably just lived through too many of them. I’m not a hot weather person, but this year I don’t think it would be too difficult to make the change. So I guess you can see why I’m looking forward to the trip this year, and by the 7^th of March I might even be able to fit in my shorts again ( 15 lbs so far ). Ya, ya, I know I wasn’t supposed to talk about the diet anymore.

The other downside to this lousy weather is that nothing is going on in my life that is interesting or exciting enough to put in a Blog. Even my damn toast has been ok……lol. The other problem is finding things to occupy myself. The refrigerators, freezers, and cabinets have all been organized (Check out the picture of our downstair’s freezer). I'm even starting to bake bread and stocking up on homemade soups. Talk about being anal, it’s even starting to scare me. Hurry up Myrtle Beach before this guy really cracks up ( only kidding, but I do need to get a life ).

The Golden Years

Well a trip to the eye doctor this morning confirmed my suspicions, I am getting old!! When I saw him two years ago he said, Bill you can still go with the same glasses. Change was only minor, but this year they’re setting up an appointment to measure up the eye for cataract surgery. I’m still fifty percent though, only the right eye needs it ….......at least for now. Oh well at least I now know why my putts keep going to the left……lol.

For all you youngsters out there I have to let you know that there are very few advantages to getting old, an occasional discount here and there and being able to hit from the senior tees when playing golf. I suppose reduced hearing at times can be considered an advantage. At times you can block out things you have no interest in hearing, but believe me, the negatives far out way any of those exaggerated claims of the “Golden Years”.

The Golden Years are greeted with new aches and pains every day, more wake up calls every night, and repeated trips to doctors to make sure you’re around long enough to experience even more of them. There might, however, be some advantage to those trips. Look at all that exercise we get from walking back and forth to the bathroom during the night.

I really should stop moaning, because the Big Guy upstairs has blessed me with some real decent health over the years, but with another one of those birthday things coming up in February I start thinking about some of these things.

"HOTDOGS"

I guess that being on a diet makes everything I do lately revolve around food. I’ve even turned my food thoughts into a church event. As President of our church Men’s group I’ve even scheduled a “Hotdog Night” after one of our Masses in February. It appears to me that almost everyone loves a hotdog. A dog with ketchup satisfies us when we’re young, then a graduation to one with mustard and even some relish. Finally the big steps we take to dogs with chili, onions and even sauerkraut. Today there are hour long documentaries on the Travel Channel showing nothing but visits to hotdog places and extolling the virtues of their sometimes strange toppings. PS., I love them all. But how did this frankfurter craze begin.
In 1852, a butchers' guild in Frankfurt produced a spiced, smoked sausage product which they named frankfurter after their hometown. It was slightly curved in shape and was often called the dachshund sausage. The product was brought over to America by Charles Feltman and Antoine Feuchtwanger. Feltman sold frankfurters and sauerkraut from a pushcart in New York's Coney Island. He opened up the first Coney Island hot dog stand in 1871. Shortly thereafter, he started selling the frankfurters with milk rolls, which were the precursors to hot dog buns. The buns that we use today were probably first introduced in St. Louis by Feuchtwanger in 1904. He was a sausage concessionaire who loaned white gloves to his customers to hold the hot sausages. Since most of his customers did not return his gloves he worked with a baker to develop a bun, which people could use to hold their sausages.
You’ll notice that everything I’ve written so far refer to the sausages as “frankfurters”, but when did they become “hotdogs”? The term "hot dog" is credited to sports cartoonist Tad Dorgan. At a 1901 baseball game at the Polo Grounds in New York, vendors began selling hot dachshund sausages in rolls. From the press box, Dorgan could hear the vendors yelling, "Get your dachshund sausages while they're red hot!" He sketched a cartoon depicting the scene but wasn't sure how to spell "dachshund" so he called them simply, "hot dogs." And the rest is history.
If all this hotdog talk has made you hungry, you’re welcome to stop by my church around 6:00 PM this coming February 21st and scoff down a couple.

Progress Report

As I write this on January 7^th it has been only five days since I bit the bullet and finally decided to do something about my ever expanding body. Already I feel better. Not that there has been any great physical change in my body, although I have lost 5 pounds, but it’s a mental thing. I just feel better about myself……it’s like hurray for me, I finally did it. Surprisingly even those few pounds have made today’s pants a little looser. The real shocker is that I already feel like moving around and doing “stuff”.

The only negative is that thoughts of food seem to invade the mind and completely take over all conscious thought: What should I have for breakfast, what’s for lunch, supper, can I have a snack? Where’s the calorie book? Can I fill myself up without over doing it? Will I be eating too many carbs?

Now menu planning becomes mathematical. Let’s see, body needs 15 calories per pound of weight and for every 5oo calories we eliminate daily I’ll loose a pound in a week. Hell, to maintain my weight I have to eat 4,223 calories. Wow, if I restrict myself to 1200 or 1500 calories I’ll lose 5 or 6 pounds this week. S—t, this is going to be a snap. Not an easy task for someone who enjoys food, doesn’t dislike anything and loves to cook. I’ve accepted the fact that this isn’t going to be a walk in the park, but I’m determined to make it happen. At my age, if I’m ever going to do it, it better be now.

Unfortunately it’s going to be costly for me on the golf course. One of my golfing opponents has made me promise that I have to reduce my handicap one stroke for every ten pounds I lose. For some strange reason he thinks my game will improve if I’m lighter……I hope he’s right. It’ll be worth it. I won’t even mind paying off the bets. I’ll keep you all posted on the progress whether you’re interested or not.

Hello 2009

Procrastination is a type of behavior which is characterized by deferment of actions or tasks to a later time. Psychologists often cite procrastination as a mechanism for coping with the anxiety associated with starting or completing any task or decision. We all procrastinate to some extent, and all though I have a few bad habits of my own, I never felt that procrastination was one of them until I gave some thought to something I’ve avoided most of 2008. Most of you are well aware of my healthy appetite, love of food, and love of cooking. Well, 2008 has been loaded with all three loves and I’m really well aware of what it has been doing to my body these past months. I’ve been able, however, to retreat from the inevitable by never looking into the mirror especially when emerging from the shower, but this is the beginning of a New Year. Well I’ve now joined the multitude thinking they will be able create a new person with resolutions that in most cases never see February.

I woke up today actually not feeling hungry or having any desire for food. The Holidays had taken their toll on even someone like me. A huge Christmas Eve buffet dinner followed by a sumptuous brisket dinner Christmas Day, followed by a roast beef dinner at friends began my inevitable collapse. Even that was not enough; all this was followed by New Year’s Day dinner of stuffed shrimp, beef Wellington and baked potato.
Wow, even writing this down is getting to me. Well I took a deep breath, took all my clothes off and starting with eyes tightly closed stepped in front of the mirror. Slowly I opened my eyes and to my surprise I saw those eight tiny reindeer from the poem, but they all seemed to be huddled in the area above my waist line…..my God!!!.....what a terrible sight. Well I think you can guess what my New Year’s resolution is. Probably a great decision, since I’ve just about run out of clothes that fit and with closets full clothes from years past that still do, the diet is a must. Diet, what a crappy word, just look at those first three letters. It’s telling me I’m going to die if I don’t and die from starvation if I do (certainly an exaggeration, but humor me).

Actually I’m not afraid of New Year’s resolutions since at 73 I’ve already given up most of life’s pleasurable things. Giving up being a pig shouldn’t be too tough, although a prayer or two from my friends might come in handy………….wish me luck.

PS: I do hope all your resolutions are met with success.