No more do you remember

Here’s a line uttered by Norman Thayer in the movie On Golden Pond when he was gassing up his boat.

“Think it's funny being old? My whole goddamn body's fallin' apart.
Sometimes I can't even go to the bathroom when I want to...but I'm still a man and can take on you punks”.

Man, can I relate to poor old Norman. My back hurts, my shoulder is killing me and like Norman, when I do have to go to the bathroom at night I have to sit on the edge of the bed to get my bearings so I don’t fall as I limp along to the can. When the hell did I get old? Seems like yesterday when I could bounce down the stairs and take them two at a time going up. Now I make sure I have a hand on the rail in either direction.

I’m also finding less and less humor in all those “old people emails” and those nostalgia ones constantly reminding me of the old days…do you remember black and white TV, keys for your shoe attached roller skates and candy cigarettes. No more please, I remember, I remember, ok! I’m also tired of the constant senior citizen doctor appointments, regular, eye, prostate, dermatologist, foot and so on and so forth. I visit the blood letting people so often they are starting to greet me by name when I walk in. My golfing partners are giving me so many strokes there’s no more room for dots on the score card. Unfortunately I need all I can get.

Enough of this already, from this day forward I refuse to think old. I’m going to begin watching Saturday morning cartoons and start all over again and thank God for letting me be here to do it.