Chrome Domes

I go to church nearly every Sunday and consider myself a pretty religious fellow, although there are many out there that might question that fact. I will, however, admit that during that hour of Mass both my mind and eyes wander most of the time. I can’t help it, I’m a people watcher and I am not selective. I watch beautiful women, ugly people, young people, and old people. This past Sunday I spent the hour staring at bald people, all of them men. I saw naked domes that could reflect light, I saw receding hairlines, friar Tuck heads, heads with little patches, big patches, just about every exhibit of bare skin you can think of.

I switched my viewing and tried to find a bald woman. Couldn’t. I saw thin hair, overworked hair, but couldn’t find a bald women. Why are they so lucky? I never before gave it a thought, but seeing that sea of scalps I couldn’t help wondering why. I think it would be fun if we had a lot of bald women walking around. Can you just imagine it?

Well I set about that afternoon to find out why this was the case. You know you can find anything on the Internet these days. I started out by Googling “Male Pattern Baldness”. Low and behold, I got my answer right away along with a bunch of pictures showing every kind of bald heads you could imagine.

Well, it turns out that most men are genetically predisposed to male pattern baldness. It is the effect of hormones on the hair follicle that produces male pattern baldness. Testosterone, a hormone that is present in high levels in males after puberty, is converted to dihydrotestosterone (DHT) by an enzyme called 5-alpha reductase. DHT has an adverse affect on the hair follicles. Acting on a hormone receptor on the hair follicle it slows down hair production and produces weak, shorter hair, sometimes it stops hair growth from the follicle completely. This process gradually depletes your stock of hair and is normal hair loss.

Isn’t it ironic that the hormone that produces our virility and masculinity eventually turns us into a bald “Old Man”. I think I’ll get a Michael Jordon Or Shaq haircut, then no one will ever know.